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For canon information, see the Mass Effect Wiki page for Cerberus Daily News. This page is for CDN members' non-canon additions.

The following stories contributed by Cerberus Daily News forum members were published on the CDN newsfeed during April 2013. See the main Cerberus Daily News page for current updates.

April 2013 – Week One[]

04/01/13 - Planetary Explosion Ruled “Relay Misfire” by Reapers[]

Jonathan Aubrey, Vigilant Scythe Hourly

An unexpected explosive event in the Latti System has turned to tragedy today as Apru Colony reported the destruction of Amadan, a dextro-based garden world once considered for quarian colonization shortly before the Reaper War. Apru, which has been relying on QEC to maintain communications with Citadel Space since the Lambda 1 Relay was destroyed, has reported that the cause of Amadan’s destruction was due to the relay accidentally launching a Reaper into the planet.

These reports come amidst Reaper assurance that repairs on the Lambda 1 Relay, along with several others, would be completed soon. In a statement issued to the colony by a Reaper entering planetary orbit, the Reapers thanked the colony for its patience in this matter.

Its final statement, “Your cycle is very important to us,” was delivered as the reaper left orbit, deafening hundreds with its horn. Attempts to receive further information have thus far been inconclusive.

The Quarian Admiralty Board could not be reached for comment on this development.

NOTE[]

This article was posted on April Fool's Day.


04/02/13 - Fleet and Flotilla: Homeworlds Goes Directly to Holovid[]

Arielle Johnson – Galaxy Entertained

RANNOCH – Risa Uvarsen will release his latest production, Fleet and Flotilla: Homeworlds, straight from Rannoch Studios to holovid later this month.

Fleet and Flotilla: Homeworlds is a three hour romantic drama, centering around quarian Shalei and turian Bellicus and their love. As Bellicus is kept away from his love by service on Palaven, Shalei tries to build a home on Rannoch. Torn between their duty for their people and their eternal love for each other, the protagonists have to face the cruel obstacles of galactic reality. Which homeworld will they end up on? Preorder the holovid on the Rannoch Studios site to find out!

The vid was filmed completely on location, making it the first and surely the biggest production from Rannoch in over three centuries.

“This movie is a showcase for the rebuilding of our holovid industry. In contrast to the first movie we will see much more of quarian music and dancing, Bat’Zaer of Rannoch Studios told Galaxy Entertained. “We have the largest dancing scene ever filmed on Rannoch in it.”

If you love Fleet and Flotilla, gaily colored suits and lots of hipshaking and singing under the moon, don’t miss Fleet and Flotilla: Homeworlds.

Rating: +++ (watch with partner)

04/03/13 - Krogan Encroachment Continues[]

One Union, One Trust

By Talissat Yevros

Reintegration of Tuchanka’s unifying Urdnot overclan with the peoples of C-space has, of course, been made official with the re-establishment of a krogan embassy aboard the seat of galactic government. However, this is not the only indication of krogan inroads into Citadel and Union life, as reports released today by the Sur’Kesh Commercial Communications Oversight Board demonstrate. Of the fifteen commercial holdings to dominate Union comm waves since the war ended, five are now under krogan control.

“Krogan are known for their preference for decisive action, but this haste is tempered by their extended lifespan and capacity for truly long-term planning,” said political analyst Goshven Joshu. “The sudden ascension of Dinroth Phroun to Chief Editor of Shockwave, among other surprise acquisitions, are representative of the encroachment made by the krogan since the war ended”.


04/04/13 - Asari Cancel Fighter Deal[]

Galea T’Jusa – The Thessian Observer

PORT LAREMA - After a vote on the subject yesterday, the asari republic of Hyetiana has cancelled a planned deal for purchasing fifty new long-range fighters.

In 2185, Kendra Council (Thessia) was contracted for a replacement of the republic’s aging fleet of Skeff Type recon and fighter force. Twelve Rebekha II long range fighters had already been delivered in 2186, but the War interrupted further introduction.

Hyetiana faced extensive destruction during the Reaper attacks, and only four of the new Rebekhas, along with a small variety of older fighter spacecraft and capital ships, survived the hostilities. When Kendra Council announced that they could now deliver the remaining order, a vivid discussion rose asking if the money should be prioritized on rebuilding infrastructure and the research facilities that made the planet such a hub of asari R&D.

A vote overturned the Defense Matrirach’s suggestion to proceed with the deal, and effectively redirected the funds to civil reconstruction.

“I bow to the public vote and I can see the reason behind it”, sais Matriarch Marrina. ”We proposed several options; we also suggested to reduce the order, but the decision was made to cancel it completely under the ‘special circumstances’ bailout clause. Of course, the current state of defense is not as I would like it to be, but given the high serviceability rate of the material at hand, I can assure everybody that Hyetiana is capable of maintaining patrols and full control in our system.”

In a first reaction, Kendra Council accepted the vote and announced their will to enter negotiations for a new contract in the future. Kendra Stock closed with -7% yesterday.


04/05/13 - Twilight of the Organ Grinder[]

Hiral Calgomis, Safety Off Weekly

It's the end of an era. Just ten years ago it would have been unthinkable, but after months of deliberation, representatives of the Turian Hierarchy have announced that they would not be ordering a new version of a legend. Known to generations of turian recruits as the Bruja, and to much of the rest of the galaxy as the Organ Grinder, the Armax LHM-17 and its predecessors have been the Hierarchy’s go-to squad automatic weapon for centuries.

The Organ Grinder’s nickname spread through the Terminus Systems like wildfire after being coined by human Relay 314 veterans, due to the unmistakable sound of its pre-fire wind-up. It will be fondly remembered for its reliability, as countless jokes immortalize its capacity for firing even when jammed and out of ammo. Every time new designs threatened to unseat the king of suppressive fire, a new, better version would be produced, maintaining its supremacy.

However, nothing lasts forever. Bruja’s design, proven and reliable, would ultimately be its downfall, as the limiting factor in weapon power became heat capacity. Successors increased the power of each shot to deal with advancements in kinetic barrier and armor technology, and heat management simply could not keep up. The LHM-17’s once-immense capacity diminished, making it less and less suited for its intended purpose. Modifications have been attempted, but the time-tested design proved as resistant to innovation as it was to wear and tear.

The final nail in the coffin was the introduction of the current Phaeston standard assault rifle, which, thanks to the use of heat clips, was capable of firing more and stronger shots than the designated squad automatic weapon. This became more evident during the Reaper War, with the Phaeston used throughout the galaxy by anybody able to get their hands on one, while the Organ Grinder lacked firepower to deal with Cerberus or Reaper creations.

Thus, after decades of faithful service, the king will finally retire. But fret not! Hierarchy officials have announced an invitation to tender its replacement in the standard assault weapon role. Notable companies have already announced joining the race for the Bruja’s legacy, with an Armax Arsenal spokesman going so far as to call it “holding onto the Primarch’s seat.”

Even Haliat Armory has dared to compete alongside the big boys, but it's not the only unusual contender. For the first time, as a gesture of goodwill, the Hierarchy will be accepting offers from client- and allied-race companies. Volus-based Elkoss Combine and the human Rosenkov Materials corporations have already declared joining the race, though it’s not known what they’ll be putting forward.

With weeks to go until the final offer date, one has to wonder: who, if anybody, can match the Old King of squad-level firepower?


04/06/13 - Task Force Assembled to Investigate Crime Spree[]

Scon Lintell, Outside In Entertainment

As of yesterday afternoon, Nos Astra officials have placed a small team of investigators into a task force dedicated to the search for sixteen-year-old Saleek Nuvetas, known to Illium residents as the “Professional Panty Raider.” The salarian, described by police as “1.8 meters tall, silver-skinned and bearing a red-striped tattoo along his horns,” has been making waves across the asari-dominated planet by breaking into celebrities’ homes and removing all articles of undergarments from the premises. No witnesses have come forth to describe his crimes, though he has left a “calling card” at each of his crimes: a holographic silhouette of the victim in question, with a highlighted pelvic region.

Victims’ reactions to the string of thefts have been mixed, from fear and horror over the thefts to sheer perplexity at the thief’s seeming refusal to take other objects.

“I just don’t get it, said Porette Nureed, noted victim and star of Astra Broadcasting Network’s Time Enough for Me. “There are so many things in my closet alone that are far more expensive than that. My Silver Satellite Award for Best Actress was sitting just outside, and it’s probably more expensive than everything he’s stolen so far…Why just go for my [undergarments]?”

Other victims, such as turian actor Eszark Mutandis, were more aggressive in their stance.

“I say let that little [censored] come back,” he said in a statement to Outside In. “Let him come back and try that little stunt again with me. Nobody comes into my home and [censored] steals from me, nobody.”

Nos Astra police have urged calm in response to this, and for Nos Astra celebrities to invest in stronger security until such time as Saleek is apprehended. Makrink Security’s security rose sharply with this statement, as did Eternity Lingerie’s.


April 2013 - Week Two[]

04/07/13 - Krogan Alliance Launches Legal Challenge[]

Cross-Posted from the Tuchanka Times

Northern Alliance, TUCHANKA – The Northern Alliance today officially lodged a legal challenge with the Citadel Council regarding travel restrictions currently enforced on all relay shipping.

Several months prior to the Reaper War, clan Gothteng of the Northern Alliance had been issued a special dispensation exempting them from the travel restrictions placed on krogan clans and enforced by CDEM. No details are available on the reason for the original dispensation, but sources within the Citadel indicate that the motion passed due to some unexpected support from factions in the government and despite CDEM’s official protest. In the months leading up to the war ship registrations with clan Gothteng increased substantially, leading detractors to accuse them of breaching the spirit of the agreement. An investigation was halted when the Reapers arrived, and in the aftermath of the war was not resumed.

The Northern Alliance legal challenge centers around this dispensation, arguing that the exemption from travel restrictions should also apply to the licenses currently required for Citadel-Space relay travel.

No comment has been forthcoming from the Council’s legal representatives.


04/08/13 - “Siatex” Project Reporting Preliminary Success, Controversy[]

by Dillon Castor, Tayseri Times

Tythius Platform, APIEN CREST - One of, if not the, the largest joint mining operations in the past asari generation broke ground today on its most ambitious task yet: the planetoid HK-2213. Streaked with veins of iridium, palladium, and possessing an abnormally large concentration of the heavy metals used in many modern alloys, HK-2213 was in the project’s sights from the very start.

“The reason that it has taken so long to build to this point is because we first needed an opportunity to gauge how well all involved were going to function on a project of this raw scale and scope. How efficiently they would be able to coordinate their actions.” Explained project founder and CEO of Cicerion Ltd. Baros Despari. Despari then went on to add that he was “exceptionally pleased” with the work of the entities involved, both public and private, thus far and that the next half dozen prospective mining sites would proceed to open on schedule.

So named after a turian spirit of the underground and precious metals, Siatex was the product of the mutual cooperation of over half a dozen turian, krogan, Terminus, and human interests. They count among their members such notables as the now resurgent United Mining Concord, currently based out of Luna, the extra-Citadel Space Legiatis Group, as well as detachments from the Hierarchy Corps of Engineers and Clan Urdnot. Heavily subsidized by the participating governments and supplied with manpower and equipment from all involved, Siatex’s stated primary goal is to “provide a steady flow of material to a galaxy starved of crucial resources”. To this end the project has embarked on a massive campaign of high intensity planetary and asteroid mining; deploying small fleets of ships and drones, multiple mobile industrial platforms, and thousands of sapients across eight (now nine) star systems.

Despite the highly promising mineral yields thus far, concerns have been raised regarding the planned expansion of Siatex operations. As Matriarch Baheris D’Mula, the primary critic of the project, stated, “taking into account the past three and six upcoming sites: two are located deep within the Terminus, three are habitable worlds that were intended at one point for colonization and, in the case of Varun II, actually colonized prior to being devastated by the Reapers, and one is a full fledged garden world. The practices used by Siatex on uninhabited planetoids are devastating to the body in question; the ecological damage when these very same ‘high intensity’ techniques are turned on valuable, inhabitable worlds will be immense and likely irreversible bar large scale intervention. These are precious resources to be preserved and cultivated, not tossed to the tender mercies of this project.”

Best estimates currently place Siatex at providing approximately 13.5 percent of the galactic market for precious and industrial metals. This number is expected to rise over the coming months.


04/09/13 - ‘Gethnapping’ Case Baffles Authorities, Worries Consensus[]

Report by Rachel Zhao, The Drescher Times. Holographs by Bella Rosales, The Drescher Times.

The bizarre case of Harmonious Accord, the ‘kidnapped’ geth program, has both the Shanxi Colonial Police Force and the Alliance Investigative Services “completely baffled”, according to an anonymous inside source, amid rumours the Geth Consensus is preparing to undertake its own investigation.

The program identifying itself as Harmonious Accord, like many other geth, left Rannoch in order to assist the galaxy’s restoration and reconstruction work after the Reaper Invasion. Little did it know that it would be caught up in what local detective Isidore Beautrelet is calling “the most baffling case [he has] ever worked on.”

“All we know is that the program’s platform was attacked by unknown assailants during a routine inspection of the city’s power lines,” Detective Beautrelet continued. “Evidence suggests that the program known as Harmonious Accord was illegally downloaded - don’t ask me how - from its platform and removed from the scene of the crime.”

In a Drescher Times exclusive, we can reveal an anonymous inside source’s perspective.

“It’s completely [blocked],” alleges our anonymous insider. “The only evidence is a dead flashlight with some scratches around an optic fibre cable. It’s just geth doing geth [blocked], there’s no need to call in those Intelligence guys. If this guy had been human, nobody would care.”

Rumours persist that the Geth Consensus is preparing their own independent investigation, although the Consensus has repeatedly denied such claims.


04/11/13 - Reaper War book “Tagalong” to be picked up as an HV Miniseries[]

Gerhard Leitner, ExpoEntertainment Magazine

“Tagalong”, Chloe Larson’s wartime account of her experiences while embedded with the SAMC 2/9th battalion which has been praised by critics and readers alike for its frank and unflinching portrait of military life in wartime, has had its rights acquired by the Star Broadcasting Office for production as an 8-part HV miniseries event.

With casting currently underway, SBO has already tabbed Joshua Harmon, the showrunner for the critically acclaimed “Atreus” as director, and Paxius Award-winning director Marius Pilun as executive producer.

“Ms. Larson’s book is quite possibly the quintessential account of the Reaper War” Harmon said in an interview with EEM shortly after the announcement. “As such, it is our goal to provide a faithful and authentic adaptation of her account that pays credit to the struggles, heroism and sacrifices of the Alliance Marine Corps.”

When asked whether it was too soon to be making an entertainment event about the Reaper War, Harmon stated “I see Ms. Larson’s book less in the context of the war itself, and rather the story of individual men and women that happened to be caught up in such a tumultuous period, and each of them just trying to make sense of it in their own ways. At least, it is what me, Mr. Pilun and SBO are aiming to portray here.”

Filming is said to begin sometime around June.


04/13/13 - Lord Lorimix Tusarn Arrested[]

OMA KER - Turian crime lord Lorimix “Army Man” Tusam was captured by Hierarchy investigators yesterday at his Intris hideout after nearly three years on the run. He is currently being held without bail to face charges of murder, extortion, and conspiracy.

Tusarn’s ten-year-long career in crime included money laundering, drug trafficking, and extortion of over a hundred Tier 10- to Tier 20 citizens in Macarvan, Digieris. His career was cut short when the Reaper Invasion began, whereupon half of his victims came out to denounce him. As his perhaps most famous victim, General Evar Dukrinix, put it, “there is no shame greater than considering yourself more important than the Hierarchy in such a time of crisis.”

It is unknown where Tusam went between his outing and his capture, but his capture comes as the result of being lured from his Oma Ker apartment by Hierarchy officials acting on a tip from the public. Tusam, 42, put up no resistance when arrested.

An employee working for the company that manages the apartment building spoke on anonymity that the career criminal had been living there for two years under the alias of “Garrus Noraean.”


April 2013 - Week Three[]

04/15/13 - Conspiracy Theories Suddenly Popular Again, Still not Correct[]

By Nor Farri, Volus Financial Biannual

It looks like it’s that time of year again, folks. The universe has quieted down, there aren’t any major conflicts going on, politics has achieved a quiet murmur in the background, and the crazies are suddenly looking for stuff to rant and rave about. That’s right, tribesmen; it’s conspiracy theory time.

The latest conspiracy of the day (or du jour, as the earthlings seem to say) is of that old volus standby, the Volanti. That’s right, folks, the Volanti have returned. Well, so says Strange Matters Blog, Voice of Omega Radio, Bizarre Universe, and every other crazy person with an extranet radioblog account and a two-credit transmitter. So convert your credits into local precious metals, lock up your valuables, and keep an eye open for the secret cephalopodian servants of the Volanti, the octopoids!

In case you’re a primitive species, such as a vorcha or a fan of Johnny Horrorshow, that was sarcasm. Seriously, the local yogurt salesman is more dangerous than the ‘Volanti.’

For those of you who haven’t been obsessed about paranoid delusions, the Volanti is supposedly a secret order of very rich volus bankers who controls the conversion rates of credits in the known galaxy and use the immense amount of money at their fingers to control the universe and blah blah blah, you’ve heard it before. It’s a standard paranoid delusion, once common across many cultures. The humans had their version with the Illuminati, the asari with the Protheanites, the turians with the Zeroth Legion, etcetra etc. Why the Volanti has persisted all these years when all these other delusions have been disproven time and time again is anyone’s guess. I guess there are certain individuals who think my species - which, I may remind you, is a client race - is in charge of the universe. I would like to point out that right now, the Vol Protectorate is going through our third civil recession since the damned rebuilding, that we’ve had to restructure the credit layout limits twice in favor of other species, and that we’re living largely off of mining subsidies right now. Doesn’t sound like a nation of secret rulers to me.

So the next time someone comes to you at the ammonia cooler and asks you if you’ve heard of the Volanti - or, even worse, if they ask you if you ARE a member of the Volanti - just show them this article, tell them to go back to the Xela Enosj show, and remind them that if there is some superior organization in charge of the universe, they’re doing a piss-poor job.

VFB Editor,

Nor Farri


04/17/13 - Manufactory to Open on Luna[]

Alii T'Plana, The Cyan Sun

Tsaliit, SUR'KESH - Today, the Sur'Kesh based manufacturing conglomerate Lorkann Virtuals revealed plans to open a manufacturing complex for their products on Earth's lone satellite Luna. In an interview one of the company's representatives, Sathril Nulum, said, "Reconstruction efforts are underway across the whole galaxy. We seek to help everyone who is recovering, and we do that by introducing our solutions right at the centre of the places with the greatest needs. Benefiting from Luna's low gravity environment and proximity to major economic centers such as Earth and the Citadel, this endeavor should aid greatly in the area's recovery, creating jobs as well as supplementing the reconstruction crews with the all-too sparse labor that they need."

Ever since the company regained its independence during the dissolution of its turian parent conglomerate, Lorkann Virtuals has seen a rapid increase in sales of construction drones, heavy lifting and material transportation equipment, bionic suits, and mobility assistance mechs. The new plant on Luna is planned to manufacture all of the above. This new investment has been welcomed by most of the locals; Drew Neil, a human who has lived most of his life on Luna, said: "It's a great chance to kickstart Armstrong's economy. They've promised to hire locally, so this may be our best hope to see our colony back on its feet someday. Ever since the war ended this place has been almost entirely neglected. Rebuilding was focused only around Armstrong and that too went slowly".

Though approved by both the local administration and the majority of the locals, this investment has nevertheless been met with some opposition. "This is just shows how money hungry corporations are looking to make a fortune out of these desperate times," said another local, speaking under condition of anonymity. "Anything that comes out of this assembly line will probably fall apart after a year and cost twice what it’s worth. This is unfair for all of us!"

Nulum ignored these comments, proceeding to unveil Lorkann's plans to expand their operations into the Apien Crest as well as a new line of state-of-the-art cybernetics.


04/19/13 - Will The Hierarchy’s Next Weapon Of Choice Be Batarian-Made?[]

Hiral Calgomis, Safety Off Weekly

Only two weeks have passed in the open tender for the Hierarchy’s new squad automatic weapon, and surprises continue to mount as Erszbat-based Dumah Gunworks, the Confederacy’s official successor to Batarian State Arms, has declared their intent to place an offer for the contract.

Although their bid’s exact nature has not been revealed, it is already a topic of discussion – Wnot just for weapon experts and gun aficionados, but also political commentators and armchair politicians. While many dismiss the situation with comments such as “Inconceivable”, “disgusting” and, in one notable case, “This just in, batarians still have delusions of grandeur”, the news has also provoked several interesting conversations. Popular extranet discussion forum Relay Four saw several attempts to vandalize a multi-page thread discussing the implications, and whether it is a sign of the Confederacy attempting to reintroduce the batarian people as a member of the galactic community. Meanwhile, SAMC quartermaster Jason Roost’s personal blog entry on the matter was shut down by vandalism. His article, which compared Batarian State Arms’ reputation for low quality to its excellent no-export products, was deleted after its comments system crashed under a barrage of anti-batarian xenophobia. (Editor’s note: With Mr. Roost’s permission, we’ve made a copy of the entry available on our site, here.)

Another interesting angle has been raised by an anonymous user of GalaxyNewsNetwork, whose one-line comment drew attention to the a lack of similar reactions when offers were made for a variant of the human-made N7 Typhoon, the asari-made Zealot (Editor’s note: actually a commissioned salarian design), or the four (at last counting) separate offers of parties claiming ownership of fabrication rights to the infamous “Revenant” light machine gun.

Representatives of the Hierarchy at first declined to comment, but later publicly dismissed a rumor that they would give in to racial prejudice and disqualify Confederate Arms Manufacture’s entry regardless of its details. One way or another, we here at Safety Off will be watching this unfold with interest.


04/20/13 - Marine Found Dead In London Ruins[]

by Bridget West, Union Post

LONDON - SATAE officials have today confirmed that a body found by construction workers yesterday in Administrative District 02 is that of Second Lieutenant Carlos Suarez, a decorated Marine who received the Navy Cross during the Reaper War.

“He was an...inspiration to a lot of us, came up through the ranks, didn’t forget what it was like being a...grunt on the ground, never asked more of the men than he was willing to give himself.” Stated Gunnery Chief Al-Musawi in an interview with the Post. “He got us through the...War, he got us through London, and to just die here, like this after all that. It isn’t right. It isn’t right, he deserved better.”

As tensions rise between Alliance marine detachments based within the city and independence-minded groups such as the Citizens for a Free Earth and the Democratic Solidarity Party, the Prefect of London, Lieutenant Commander Lisa Bryner, held a press conference earlier this morning urging calm and restraint on both sides. “I ask that everyone allow the Investigative Service to conduct their investigation and bring Lieutenant Suarez the justice he deserves. The last thing London needs is more violence.”

Thus far representatives of the Systems Alliance have declined to comment on the condition or state of the body when found giving strength to rumors that the killing had been ritualistic in nature. When pressed for an official statement by the Post a spokesman for the Prefect’s office said that “the investigation was ongoing” and he did not have the authority to comment on the situation further.


April 2013 - Week Four[]

04/23/13 - Crime Lord Launches Prison Escape Using Prosthetic Limb[]

INTRIS - Hierarchy officials of both Oma Ker and Digeris are offering a 7,500 credit reward for information leading to the capture of turian crime lord Lorimix Tusam, whom has managed a daring prison escape using unorthodox techniques.

Hierarchy officials were shocked to learn that the man had escaped after his quiet capture ten days ago near his Oma Ker apartment, but security footage from the escape shows that the man literally had a surprise up his sleeve.

“We were guiding him from one transport to the other when his entire right side seemed to just fall off,” stated Intris Correctional Facility official Omen Hap, speaking from his hospital bed at Intris. “Then I’ve got something jumping at my face there was shooting, and, well, next thing I knew I woke up here.”

Tusam has now been identified as an amputee, presumably from the the Reaper War, having hidden the cybernetic device from authorities through elaborate E/M shielding and clothing choices. The limb, which was incapacitated on-site, was outfitted with elaborate technology, adapting omni-blade offensive technology to “run” and attack enemies using miniature bladed limbs of its own.

During the ensuing firefight, Tusam escaped his escort, retrieved a firearm from a wounded officer, and escaped on the transport he was carried in on. His whereabouts are currently unknown.

Hierarchy officials warn that Tusam is considered to be armed and very dangerous. Anyone who sees him is urged to contact law enforcement at the following address.


04/25/13 - Naked Asari Matriarch Causes Chaos at Intersection[]

Erolyn, SANVESS - An elderly asari was arrested after leaving her residence nude, walking into traffic, and overthrowing every vehicle in a ten-yard radius.

Aunitha T’Rovisan, 1182, has been a Matriarch for the past four centuries. Once a formidable biotic commander, time has quietly been taking its toll on her, as she has been shrinking out of the political eye for the past 32 years. Since the end of the Reaper War, she has been taking up residence in an assisted living home. This changed, however, in a matter of minutes last night.

“I don’t understand how she did it,” said 216-year-old Sheen Lohersweil, who has been caring for the old Matriarch since she arrived at the home. “For the past week, she’s been meditating quietly in her room, and she’s required assistance for moving from room to room for quite some time. How she managed to undress is beyond me, let alone leaving.”

The Matriarch’s outburst has caused several thousand credits’ worth of damage, not including the hospitalization of three asari with cracked ribs and head injuries. She was subdued after two huntresses were deployed, incapacitating the woman through their combined biotics. She is being treated for her injuries at an undisclosed location.


04/27/13 - Cardinals elect Joseph Peter Kelly as Pope Pius XVIII []

By Father Andrew Peterson- Galaxiae Catholicae

ROME, LATIUM,  PAPAL STATES - A puff of white smoke from the newly restored Sistine Chapel announced to the cheers of thousands of faithful that the gathering of Catholic cardinals picked a new pope from among their number on Thursday, choosing the cardinal from London, Britannica, Papal States.

The new pope, Joseph Peter Kelly, will be called Pius XVIII and will be the 272nd pontiff of the Roman Catholic Church. Before he was elected Supreme Pontiff, Joseph Peter Kelly was a cardinal from the popular traditionalist society, Priestly Fraternity of Saint Peter (FSSP), known as Fraternitas Sacerdotalis Sancti Petri in Latin, the language of the Church. 

"I would like to thank you for your embrace," the new pope, dressed in a beautiful white cassock with a red ermine trimmed mozetta, said from the balcony of the newly restored St. Peter's Basilica as thousands cheered below. "These have be"en times of great darkness, but the Gates of Hades shall not prevail.

Speaking in accented Latin, he blessed the faithful and asked the audience to "Pray for the souls who lost the fight against the Reapers, and that they may reach eternal peace and joy in Heaven."

He bade a complex farewell in Latin and the crowd cheered the new pope.

Pius XVIII had led volunteer centers in the Papal city of London during the Reaper War where he would preach to the faithful and helped the local resistance to stay safe from the Reapers, and since the death of the previous pope during the Reaper invasion, he has been a voice of leadership for the Church.

He inherits a church with an array of challenges, such as a shortage of priests, the incorporation of aliens into the Church, and a lack of leadership due to the near genocide of humanity by the Reapers.

His Holiness spoke about the Reapers in the homily during his Solemn Coronation High Mass at Saint Peter's Basilica, which was set to Bach's beautiful "Mass in B-Minor", a glorious 18th Century Latin Mass setting. He stated during his homily: "The Reapers may have taken away much from our lives, but there is one thing they will never take away- The Holy Sacrifice of the Mass. If it were not for this holy offering, our world would be an abyss, scattered with our remains and Reapers reigning triumphant. The Mass is what holds our galaxy on its base. Even if the Reapers destroyed Sol, it would be easier for us to survive because this Eucharistic offering to almighty Deus would illuminate the world... We belong to Eccelsiae Militans. Church Militant. And she is militant because on this Earth and throughout our galaxy, the powers of darkness are ever restless to encompass her destruction."

Pius XVIII seems to embrace the ancient baroque traditions of the Catholic Church, continuing  the long line of traditional Pontiffs since the first American pope, Pius XIII was elected in 2022, otherwise known as Cardinal Raymond Leo Burke, who reversed many changes from the Second Vatican Council in the 1960s, specifically those made be Pope Paul VI. 

Pius XVIII has a doctorate in sacred theology, philosophy, and canon law. He is considered to be part of the long linge of traditionalist intellectuals of the Papacy, having an almost philosophical and baroque outlook on every event. 

He has yet to comment on the plans laid down by SATAE.

April 2013 - Week Five[]

04/29/13 - Enter Abroholos - CAM Unveils Candidate for Hierarchy SAW[]

Hiral Calgomis, Safety Off Weekly

The Extranet has been rife with rumors these past few days, ever since the confidential meeting between representatives of Confederate Arms Manufacture (CAM) and the Turian Hierarchy. Many have speculated that it was where CAM introduced their entry into the Hierarchy’s squad assault weapon tender. As the details have finally been released, we can definitely state the rumors are true.

At a presentation at the famed Camp Petrefax, CAM - represented by senior board member Rahab Had’desh and a small armed entourage - demonstrated prototypes of the XAR/2H to a selection of delegates for the Hierarchy’s military and logistic services. All sorts of rumors and speculation surrounded the weapon, both prior to and after the meeting, but much of it has been proven incorrect.

First, popular theories that the weapon would be named Kamalar, Brakkor, Goronak or Granak were all unfounded (if well-researched) speculation. Instead, the XAR/2H has officially been christened the Abroholos - a name that commentators are quick to point out is a reference to either a Khar’shan mountain range, a minor turian wrathful spirit class, or an Earth wind.

Similarly false were “leaks” that the XAR/2H would utilize a heat disposal system based around micro-clips (like the N7 Typhoon), or a proprietary cooling slug (such as the Revenant). Instead, the weapon makes use of a large amount of standardized rifle heat clips. This revelation elicited expressions of doubt, but this turned to interest as demonstrators showed the weapon accepting several heat clip types designed for the Phaeston. Although the exact specifics are confidential, the weapon is believed to use a revolving setup that holds several clips simultaneously, loading fresh ones from the weapon’s high-capacity magazine as spent ones are ejected, all while maintaining a constant rate of fire.

The Abroholos, described by one of those present as having the bulk, weight and design aesthetic of “two Kishocks in an over-under configuration,” has a distinct silhouette, and some critics have expressed doubt about the front grip being placed on the underside of the barrel shroud, with the user’s front hand between it and the underbarrel magazine. The weapon appears primarily designed to be fired either from the hip, or using the built-in folding bipod. Firing from the shoulder has been described as “possible, but somewhat uncomfortable”.

The weapon uses a proprietary recoil compensation using a secondary, reverse “kick” after every shot; in addition, the bulk of the weight has been placed underneath. Due to this, participating Hierarchy soldiers described the XAR/2H as “Very unintuitive at first” but quickly went on to praise the weapon’s high capacity and firepower, as well as unmatched stability while firing. Although it’s not the final version, a number of questions required CAM representative Rahab Had’desh to note that whether the Abroholos will be released on the open market “had yet to be decided.” However, commentators agree that, should it be selected, CAM’s facilities will be hard-pressed to meet the Hierarchy’s manufacturing demand.

On a darkly humorous note, one of the models suffered a jam during the presentation. This fact was not noticed at first, as the user calmly kept firing for several seconds more, leading to the viral sentiment of “I couldn’t think of a better tribute to the Bruja.”

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